Egotism

It's 10:19 AM in the morning...as I was relaxing for a bit, preparing the outing coming this Saturday, my dad opens the door...as usual... I thought he was going to ask the same few questions again... But not today.

He is pissed. That's what I can clearly see and feel from him. But as we carry on the conversation, oh, maybe not we, but mainly him, I see another hidden emotion behind his eyes...

He is hurt. His pride is hurt. For all my years even since I can recall, I've never seen my father held tears in his eyes, not to even mention about crying.
Self-admiration, haughtiness, egotism...that's my father. Normally.
But today, he is upset...by his own sister...

"We've been looked down!" This is the summary of his message. As he was whining about the "fakefulness" of my 姑姑, which is his little sister, his eyes is filled with tears... Tears of disappointment...anger...and sadness...

Well, "Whatever a man sows, that he will also reap." Galatians 6:7 is what on my spiritual calendar tells me today. My aunt mocked my father while he is talking bad things about my 大伯，which is his big brother. My father say sarcastically about how he used to bad-mouth his big brother with his little sister, who, was once the closest sibling to my father. But instead, my aunt mocked him back and tease him regarding his failure of marriage and life...my father seems to have lost all his siblings, and left with anger and bitterness.

But as we're talking, he seems to be proud of his first son, who is going to be a missionary co-worker in Thailand soon... And he sure is very good at comforting himself... Which is what he always would do. Try to evaluate own self and to belittle others to comfort himself...